A lame attempt to get organised

Wondered why you meet all these people in your life when apparently they don’t affect the course of your life in any tangible way. Well…I have wondered a lot of times and today the answer seems to start to take form. There are different categories…I mean the people who don’t affect you…one set comes in a flash and leave you as fast as they make their entry. Then there are these people who figure in your daily life at definite periods. Say for example the security personnel who is always the first face to greet me as I enter the University campus. I don’t know his name, but his face is as familiar to me as the faces of my classmates. Then the next category…the set of people whose presence in your life creates an unsettling feeling. Your life would not change one single bit, atleast as far as external realities are concerned, if they chose to go away from it. I purposely say that if THEY chose to go away because for some unexplainable reason you wish them to stay where they are. But their presence constantly reminds you of something that has been brewing inside for years, things which you never allow to come out of the mind’s chasms. As far as Iam concerned there are many thoughts that I choose not to articulate in speech sounds or in words because though I know that it is the truth I realise almost instantaneously that the physical reality is not going to change accordingly, for me. I thereby choose to remain and appear a practical unfeeling cynic rather than confront them (my true intuitions about stuff) and become dissatisfied and restless. You can call it my strategy for leading a happy life when I have to compromise with a lot of things.

So coming back to the people in your life who unleash all the pent up thoughts. Iam ensconced in my couch with a bag of potato chips by my side watching my favourite movie (thats not exactly my idea of a comfortable life but then for want of better metaphors i stick to it)when all of a sudden this person comes by, gives me a jerk, toppling me from my couch. I get up with difficulty and reestablish myself in my former position. The whirl wind of a person comes again! You are again left sprawled on the ground. Every time you meet this person a whirl wind strikes your mind and disorganizes it. Or rather it is more like a minor volcanic eruption. The lava frothing inside your mind gets thrown out. I say these whirl winds disorganize the mind because they don’t fit into our private space. I have been trying hard to avoid personal examples but looks like I can’t help it anymore. There is this person I know who thinks like me, who identifies the same things that I have found interesting, there is this strange and eerie feeling of camaraderie. But this person refuses to fit into my private space. I just fail to find a space that would accommodate X . X just refuses to succumb to my organizing principles. That is why I talk about whirl winds and disorganization.

My question is why do such people exist? Why should they come into our life? X does not effect any change, for that matter, in my life. But once we part after a meeting what remains is this unsettling feeling…the feeling alone. It is not even a clearly defined feeling. Its more like an all pervading sensation. Its there hovering above your head (or inside it? Iam not sure). Life goes on as usual but its there…troubling you only if you consciously try to define it. You try to get hold of the nebulous matter and mould it into a definite shape it just slips off , tiring your limbs.

Maybe this is what they call the essence of life…that chunk of the Oversoul (thats the aftereffect of one semester of Emerson and Whitman)which dwells in our body. It even makes me want to believe in such abstract stuff as platonic love…

A Garage Movie

You don't require a certificate from some film institute to put your ideas on screen. "The Burial of the Dead" proves that Idea is what matters. I hope more such things would happen at the institute. The rest of "The Wasteland" needs to be interpreted, and maybe the next time around someone else can step into the role of Pramod. I mean.. why not? When we made BOD it was just a group of ametures(which we still are) making an ameture movie supported by ameture movie ideas, ameture camera angles, ameture editing, ameture acting(ofcourse) and borrowed music. The whole cost excluding the mobile was just under 50rs. All you need is a producction controller like Joby. Though he didn't spend a single paisa from his pocket, without him the film would never have worked out so well. And yes an editor. But today editing softwares are available for free and it is also not that hard to find an editor. Anyone coming out form some animation institute can cheaply do it for you.
The acting part of it, i cannot explain that. I really don't know where is the acting part in BOD. I walked a few miles, I sat, I stood, I drew a few circles. The only stunt that i did was lying down in that grave(if you can call that one). I mean... these are things that anyone can do. So do the acting part for yourself. So it is not that hard, you see...nd Pramod is there always ready to help you. He might seem a little confusing, but that's no problem. There is nothing wrong in getting a little confused when you are in safe hands. So start working on it. Best of luck!!